Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Things

There's this thing that's come into my life. It's a huge thing. A very complicated, haunting huge thing that I'm wrestling with. I don't like the thing or what it's doing, but I have no control over it. The thing has the ability to bring me to tears in an instant. It is also capable of triggering a memory that I haven't had for 30 years too.

Despite my hatred for the thing, I realize I must come to terms with it. I want to smash it to bits most of the time. Other times, I want to wish the thing away. It's a big, ugly, mean thing and it has no friends.

I pray to God that the thing will just go away; back to where it came from. Maybe he'll listen and work one of his miracles and kill the thing. Or maybe he'll use the thing to somehow strengthen my faith in him; I don't know how, but who am I to doubt God's plan and work? He does strange things with things sometimes.

And so if you have a thing like this in your life, know that I feel for you. Everyone's thing comes in a different form and size and hits them in a different way. If there's a way to make the thing go away, I'm all ears. Because I hate this thing.

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