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Showing posts from May, 2009

Left, Right, Left, Right, repeat...

I went golfing with the fellas today. It was as gruesome as could be expected. While I hit every drive decently, the rest of my game resembled a spastic pirate on crack. Arrghh! Let's just say that I didn't break 60, and yes, that was for 9 holes, not 18. I figure if you take away those 3 nines I shot, I did really average. Throw those in though and...well I'm sore.

It is absolutely the hardest game on the planet. Any man that says it's for sissies (as I once did) has never played the game. It's one of those games that's 95% mental, 5% physical. Here's what goes through my head in 9 holes.

Hole #:

1. Not a bad start. It's going to be a good day. Look at the weather!
2. Whoa, that drive was a bit of a slice. Better luck next hole.
3. A seven on a par 4? C'mon Jim, get your head in the game.
4. There we go a bogey, only one over. You're a star.
5. What was that? You did everything wrong that hole.
6. I'm not very good, but I'm better than that gu…

Pee Wee Goes for a Ride

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I freed my bike from captivity today. The bike technician pirates at Cyclesmith released it to me after a week and a day. I had messed up my derailleur (that's french for "expensive, complicated, shifter-thingy) to the point where it would not hit 1st, 8th, or 15th gear. I could have lived with that reality, but knowing there would come a hill that required 8th and only 8th gear, I had to have it fixed. For sanity sake, you see. Because I'm nuts that way.
I paid my $17.33 and was again the proud owner of a 14 year old Trek. Now, rumor has it that my wife, bless her heart, was actually planning on getting me a new bike for Father's Day. While I was originally overwhelmed and excited about the prospect, having my old bike back suddenly changed all that.
I took it out for a test ride after I got it back tonight and was happy as a clam. "Why in the world would I need a new bike?" This one rides fine. I'm used to the riding position and know how it handles like…

The Dog Ate my Homework

I was auditing a writing class tonight so did not get to blog as I'd hoped (Wed. and Sat/Sun). I'm very excited about the class and all it holds. It starts on June 17th.

I will try to get a blog post in Tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Blogging off...

Technology bytes!

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The blogging door was open so I had to go through it. This despite the fact that the dog needs a walk and countless house projects beckon. C'mon it's Sunday, cut me some slack.
We have issues with our new ATTDVR lately that the stupid thing pixels out every minute or so, to the point of missing some key dialog at points. I decided to take some action on this last week and called 1-800-ATT-ISNOGOOD or some catchy number like that. I got a very nice woman who, bless her non-American heart, was trying her best to be a good technical help, but failed. Now, I had 30 minutes alloted for this call, because I had a meeting to go to, but figured it wouldn't take more than 10 minutes or so. Well, the introduction and contact information exchange took 10 minutes. It's like every time I make a service call they've never heard of me before. Name, address, State, sexual orientation, political party affiliation. Yep, all the same as the last time I talked to you.
The line I like t…

Filling the Pain

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Ah, I love the 40's. That's the great time in life when the fillings that hurt so much getting them as a 13 year old start to rust and fall out. You would think something made out of mercury, aluminum, and kryptonite would last longer than 30 years. Am I being unrealistic here? Surely not.
In any case, I had 2 of them done today. Back left molars if you must know. Big honkin' fillings from what I can tell. I can't open my mouth far enough to see them because she (my dentist) made me open my mouth so far, it messed up my TMJ, another gift that keeps on giving into your 40's. Seriously, I can only open my mouth about 50% of what is usual. If I had to speak this blog right now, it wouldn't be happening, my friend. If it was, you'd only hear 50% of it, or every other word. Now there's some people in life I WISH I could only hear 50% of, but unfortunately they don't know who they are.
What a great superpower that would be though, eh? "Half Speak&quo…

Livin' in the 80's

Once a song by a band Killing Joke, the title comes to mind today when the temps dipped into the 80's for much of the day. I had forgotten how blue a cloudless sky could be.

So yesterday was the Boys Club post-mortem appreciation meeting combined with the planning for the Crystal River canoe trip in June. The meeting was conducted in the essence of all prior Boys Club events and meetings, namely shameless disorder, confusion, randomness and frequent loss of direction. It started with a prayer, and frankly, that's about where the focus ended. The rest was random, mindless opinion, undocumented hearsay, pointless long-winded personal stories, all interspersed with a plate of the best lasagna I've had in quite a while. Like most County Government meetings, the best thing about it was the food, in this case Italian, not donuts.

Over dinner, the topic turned to Big Oil, CAFE Standards, electric cars and bio-diesel. One gentleman claimed that China is ready to turn out a 300 mi. r…

Death of a Friend

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I think the relationship has come to an end. The beast is dying. It even smells of death. The Kirby Heritage Classic is on life support. The motor revs up and down like it's getting power surges all the time now. The headlight works all the time know, to the point where my kids were asking when we put a light on the vacuum. I think it's just kind of a last gasp for the old girl before she shuts out her light for good.

It is a mixed blessing for me. Technology wise, it's a bit like pushing a Harley Davidson around the room when the rest of the world is using mopeds. I know "nothing cleans like a Kirby" and all that, but you know what? I'm willing to try.

We went out and got a new Eureka today and I feel like a man who's having an affair or something. After years of dutiful, beautiful service, I'm dumping the beast like so much baggage. Heartless *!&%. When I think of the pounds of cat and dog hair she's suffered through, and the stray shoelaces…

Time for It

A good day today. Nice, pleasant weather and all.

Walking the dog with my Ipod is one of the better parts of my day lately. Is that sad, or what? I'm not sure what to think about it. It's my happy place each day, because;

A. I'm outdoors, where I love to be most.
2. I'm getting exercise, a favorite pastime of mine
iii. I'm listening to tunes, another favorite pastime.

So while it might be sad, it's me. Simple, pleasurable down time. I think the dog likes it too because;

1. He's with his best bud.
ii. He can get away with peeing on the "floor"
C. He can eat any discarded food remnant that I don't block him from. (Yeah, best bud...right)

The neighbors probably set their clocks by my Toby walks, and that's OK too. I'm here to help.

Blogging off...

Happy Mr. Mothers Day.

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Day 3 of doing the single parent thing and a bit of weariness has set in. I almost gave in to a nap at 4:50, but took a bike ride instead. It did my body gooder than a nap would have. What a great word.

Seriously, it's not bad. It's just there's no one to "tag off" to. Parenting is a lot like tag team wrestling, without the head smashes into the turnbuckle. Though that sounds like a good solution for when the kids are nitpicking at each other, at times. (Am I a bad Dad for thinking that? Probably...)

The kids have actually been good. Sarah is becoming SUCH a teenager. It's going to be a long 5 years, let me tell you. She's suddenly got a 10 year old moron brother and two parents who seem to be getting dumber by the day, so hey, she's here to save the day! I'll let her tell you about that.

What's with the stupid cats wanting attention for nothing more than their next meal? Why we got two of these ungrateful creatures I may never understand. I lik…

Mindiola Mudbowl 2009

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Waking up to a soggy overcast morning, after an allnight rain, I expected Ben's soccer game to be cancelled, to no avail. It turned out for the better as the Pirahnnas won 6-3 in a high scoring bonanza. Ben got an awesome assist as he shot from the left hand side of the goal. It turned out a bit short, but ended up right on the foot of his teammate Aaron who scored.

It was one of those situations where the actual assist was better than the goal itself. Ben's teammates seemed to congratulate him more than the guy who scored. There might be a bit of Father-bias in the whole thing, but hey, you have to give me that much. In any case, it is so good to see my son out there competing and contributing to his team's success. As an adult who loved sports as a kid, I hope he will continue his athletic pursuits the rest of his life. Being physically fit is so important to your quality of life. But I digress.

Random thoughts and quotes:


"Heaven is a place that has to be believed t…

A Crown for a Prince.

My annual visit to the dentist today was a lesson in dental hygiene futility. I floss and brush daily, religiously as my wife will attest. Why then did they find not 1, not 2, but 3 fillings that need replacing? Add to that another tooth that needs a full crown, and well, it was a crappy way to start a Friday.

On the bright side, they can do it all in 3 easy appointments. No inconvenience there, no. I think they must be feeling the economic slump at Forward Dental or something. It didn't help that the hygienist was giving the doctor a heads up on everything she saw. "Yeah, number 14 looked fractured, and 7 looked kind of weak, and 21 looked a little shaky...etc." Hey, when did you get your doctorate, eh? I wanted to tell her to shut up and go sterilize some tools or something.

Frankly the crown thing scares me a bit. I've never had one and having had people describe it to me, it just sounds like ouchy. Besides, only old people are supposed to get crowns. Come to think …

A Swine and Pleasant Misery

The impending pandemic may never happen, but it won't be for lack of media coverage. My goodness, you'd think people were dropping like flies. This is one thing our economy needs right now is people being told to stay home. Don't shop, go to a ball game, or the school play. Stay at home and sponge bathe yourselves with clorox wipes.

I see Yusuf (aka Cat Stevens) has a new album out. Last I heard, he was becoming a Tibetan Monk or something, never to write secular music again. It must be that Capitol Records pays better than Buddah. Either that or he didn't like the bare feet thing.

So I wake up my 13 year old daughter at 6:45 on Thursday. (She sets her alarm for 6:15, don't ask why. I think it's just to annoy me.) She says "gosh, I wish you wouldn't wake me up so late". She has to be to leave for school by 7:05.

Now thinking I'd help her out today, I woke her once at 6:35. Then, at 6:43 I woke her again and all she said was "I know!". S…